Evening Walk

Gotta roll up the sleeves and get a little dirty

Thunderstorms used to scare me. I would be terrified of the loud noise and hope that when I came up out of the covers the noise would be gone. Right now as I look outside my living room window, the sun is brightly shining in all its glory. But I also see rain drops falling and I hear thunder... but its completely sunny outside! How pretty.

I've been trying to gather all the things floating around in my head from messages heard within the past month and Bible verses or chapters read from certain books to make some kinda sense out of them. Sometimes there's just so much going on in my head I need a couple weeks to figure out exactly what I've been reading or studying. Over the past month and a half, I've walked into the book of Jeremiah in the Bible. In the midst of this I've also placed aside my usual reading book and started a separate book titled One Thing You Can't Do In Heaven by Mark Cahill (which I highly recommend). I feel like I have reading ADHD! I don't usually put aside one book to start another but for some reason I did this time. Throw into it the mix of messages I heard at a Christian conference in July and it all starts to get a little confusing and a bit jumbled up in my mind, well, until I started thinking about it all. These past couple of weeks following the conference, I've been thinking about these questions that someone posed: "What if Jesus really meant what He said? What if God is serious about what He says in the Bible? And what are we gonna do about it?" Now of course, the obvious answer is certainly God is very serious about every single word He authored in His Word, the Bible!! But even knowing that, I know I don't live as if I know this oh-so-obvious truth.

Now with constantly having that in the back of my mind, I've been reading Jeremiah. I've come across this repetitive situation (literally from chapters 34 to 47 so far) between God and the people of Judah. God tells them that if they do a certain thing, there will be bad consequences such as being conquered by King Nebuchadnezzar. But the people of Judah, knowing this obvious truth spoken from the mouth of God himself through the prophet Jeremiah, refuse to believe God's words and instead, they regard God's truth as a lie. They do exactly what God told them would bring them bad consequences (like being conquered) and then they blame God for the consequences! Reading this has made me really think about the fact that- what God says He will do, He does.

When God says He's going to do something, He does it!

Now with constantly having that in the back of my mind, I've been reading the book One Thing You Can't Do In Heaven. Mark goes through various practical ways to witness and actually do what we Christians are commanded to do-spread the Good News! The way he uses real life witnessing examples are very encouraging to someone like me who rarely witnesses to strangers. I mean if what God means what He says about His ability to make us fishers of men, then I should be letting out my net for a catch right? Sometimes reading Cahill's encounters make me wonder why I am so timid when it comes to sharing my faith. Even last week at work a coworker asked me about my belief on a certain faith based issue and I felt timid sharing my Christian view fearing rejection or being rebutted so hard I wouldn't be able to answer. But I was really being scared of nothing-I feared a lie the devil uses constantly to keep us Christians afraid and shy away from boldly stating what God says as truth. But something Cahill said about witnessing made me think in a way that I never did before:
[start of excerpt from Cahill's book]
"What are the only three possible things that can happen when we share our faith?
1) the person can accept Jesus Christ
2) the person can reject Jesus Christ
3) we can plant a seed
After we talked about these possibilities we came up with a chart that looked like this:

ACCEPT	PLANT SEED	REJECT
Good	Good	Bad
Winning	Winning	Losing

We determined that accepting Jesus was a good situation, planting a seed was a good situation and someone rejecting Jesus was a bad situation. Another way to look at it was that accepting Jesus was a winning situation, planting a seed was a winning situation and being rejected was a losing situation. We concluded that 66% of the time that we share our faith it is a winning situation. Aren't those pretty good odds? Two-thirds of the time that we share our faith, we literally can't lose! But the next day, God spoke to my heart like never before. I was reading 1 Peter 4:14 which says, "If ye be reproached for the name of Christ, happy are ye: On their part he is evil spoken of, but on your part he is glorified." Just think about that for a moment. If we ever got rejected in the name of Jesus, we will be blessed and the glory of God will rest upon us. If you could have the glory of God shine in your life and be reflected onto others, would you want that? We all would as much as possible! One way that will happen is if we are rejected in the name of Jesus. God wasn't done with me yet. Luke 6:22-23 says, "Blessed are ye, when men shall hate you, and when they shall separate you from their company, and shall reproach you, and cast your name as evil, for the Son of man's sake. Rejoice ye in that day, and leap for joy: for, behold, your reward is great in Heaven: for in the like manner did their forefathers unto the prophets." After God showed me these two verses, I realized I had been mistaken about my previous chart. I'd said we had a 66% chance of a winning situation when we share our faith. Now that we know those two verses, let's see how the chart changes,

ACCEPT	PLANT SEED	REJECT
Good	Good	Good
Winning	Winning	Winning

." [end excerpt from the book]

Wow right??! Every time I share my faith, it's a winning situation! I never thought about it like that before.
I've actually never thought this intensely on these three things before: the fact that God regards what He says in His Word seriously (things heard from conference) so I should do the same also. I'm also thinking about the fact that when God says He will do something, He does it (things seen in book of Jeremiah). I'm also considering the things God has been convicting my heart of as I've been reading Cahill's book.

As I got ready this morning to go for a hair cut appointment, I decided to bring my One Thing You Can't Do In Heaven book along with me to read while I got my hair cut. While driving in the car, I prayed that God would give me a spirit of courage and not timidity (2 Timothy 1:7) to either place tracts on the cars parked in the parking lot of the mall or even be able to bodly share Christ in a conversation with the hairstylist who would cut my hair. I remember thinking in my head, Lord I'm not really sure how I would even start a conversation about you...I don't want her to be freaked out if the first thing I asked her when I sat down in the chair was, "If God-forbid you were to die today, where do you think you would be?" So God, it would be pretty cool if the hair lady started a conversation with me about my book, that would actually give me a way to talk about you and share my faith. As I arrived in the parking lot five minutes late to my hair cutting appointment, I ran from my car to the mall, past all the other cars that I had hoped to put tracts on. I sat down in the waiting area where I saw the hair dresser working on another client. So I thought why not read my book? Ten minutes later, a young woman came up to me and told me she would be washing my hair today. I remember praying God, help me. So I followed her to the chair and sat down with my purse and book in hand. We talked about hair products and how the business for the day was going. Before I knew it, the wash was done and she said another lady would be over to cut my hair. I remember thinking, well way to blow it Jerry, you didn't say a word to her! The hairstylist came over and asked me what I wanted done to my hair. So I focused my attention the next couple of minutes on explaining to her exactly what I wanted done to my hairs. She started separating my hair and started cutting and I resumed my attention to reading more of my book. Moments later...
"So uh, what kinda book ya reading there? Any good stuff in there??"
I was stunned and as I had a smile on my face I lost words for a second while praying Oh dear God please help me...and oh boy, Lord, are you good!
I replied, "It's a great book! It's making me think a lot about heaven. Especially after the whole Colorado incident- crazy right?"
She agreed "I know right, even scarier thinking how that could happen just about anywhere." After looking for a way to start, I decided to take the dive, so I asked, "Hey, lemme ask you something, let's say you and I were in that theater that night, and if we weren't one of the survivors, where do you think you would be?" She stopped to think for a while and said, "Hmm, well I don't really believe in a hell but I would hope I would be somewhere like heaven!" So I asked her, well you believe in God right? She replied, "Yes, I mean did you see the huge cross tattooed on my arm? And I went to catholic school when I was younger but with all the different religions out there like Catholicism and Christianity even though they're similar they're very different, so how can ya really know which one is right?" I remember thinking wow God, you're really opening doors here! So I asked her, "Well, let's say you weren't a survivor and now you're facing God and he's asking you, "Why should I let you into my heaven?" That made her think for a while and she replied, "well I would hope to say I've done the best with the life I was given." So I asked her if she was familiar with the Ten Commandments and she said "ofcourse!" So I asked her, well let's see if by God's standards if you and I would be good enough to get into heaven. "Have you ever lied?"
"Well, yeah of course I have." She replied.
So I asked, "Well what does that make you and me?"
"Sinners" She said
"Well, let's not go that far, we're liars right?" I said
"Yeah, we're liars" She replied.
"Well have you ever stolen, even if it's a small pen?"
She replied, "Well yeah! TD bank has some awesome pens and I take a couple every time I go in there!" We laughed and I got back to the next question, "Jesus said that if we lust after a person in our hearts we are committing adultery with them, have you ever lusted after a person?"
She replied, "Yeah of course I have done that, who hasn't!"
So I said, "Well, by you and I right now by our own...(here is where I lost the right word and she actually finished the sentence for me!)
"By our own admission...." she said
I replied, "Yeah! By our own admission, we just said we're lying, thieving, adulterers. Now when God looks at you after you die where do you think you'll be going?" She stopped cutting my hair and said, "Wow, I guess I wouldn't have much to say."

We had a wonderful conversation about what the Lord did for the both of us on the cross of Calvary 2000 years ago when Christ divided history! (B.C. and A.D hehe) I could tell she was really listening because every once in a while I would lose my train of thought and she would remind me what I was saying! After my hair cut, I handed the her a tract and the lady said she really enjoyed the conversation! She had even told me that her roommate in college was a believer who had been converted from being a Jehovah's witness and she remembers her roommate not being persuaded to do wrong things! What a great testimony her roommate left even before I was able to mention Christ to her!! I'm not sure what she will do with the words that were spoken to her but I am comforted by knowing that whatever happens, seeds have been planted- it is a winning situation!

Boy, what a wake up call. I'm reminded to stop sitting around and to roll up my sleeves and get in the ring. I remember thinking wow that was truly something! But I shouldn't have been surprised- it really was proof that God is serious about His word and when God says He'll do something, He really does it! He supplied me with words and an opportunity today to do what I should be seeking to do everyday. Praise God! He really backs up His Words with His mighty deeds!

Trying to Reminisce with a Mental Memory Card

Ahhhh, home. After two or so weeks of being away, I'm finally at "home".

During the course of one week, I had rested my head in three different states. Now that I'm home, I find myself reflecting on the past week. It was a crazy week full of planes and 12 hours on the open road. The only things I missed were July 4th fireworks and a hot plate of chorrr and mean curry. But what is particularly interesting about the trips I made is I don't have any pictures to remember it by.

I did bring my camera for the first place I visited (Tampa) but I didn't get a chance to use it much...and by the end of that trip I had made the decision to leave it at home for my trip to Indiana which was two days after I arrived home from Florida. I simply didn't find the need for it. Here at home is where I'm realizing the effects of that conscious decision I made. I now have to depend solely on my memories of last week....there are no pictures I have of certain memorable or funny moments that would usually be captured on a timeless microchip that can replay your favorite memories to you in an instant. I find myself at work sometimes reminiscing on small aspects of the road trip such as where we stopped to eat breakfast or what mountain range we drove past....sad to say it's strange having to use my actual memory to remember scenes of my life rather than having a tangible photograph to say "Look! Here's where we stopped on our drive through Ohio!" All that being said, being forced to remember scenes from my life served as a blessing in disguise: this whole *depending on my memory* thing has helped me realize just how much actually stuck in my head from the past week- the new faces I'd met and most importantly the lessons I'd learned. So at work the other day I was thinking about reflecting and recollecting my thoughts so that I might have one place where I can look back on it all.

Thinking back to Tampa, if there was one silly life lesson I'd have to remind myself of over again it would be-
1. Never leave your luggage unattended.
I remember leaving my Bible, handbag and my one and only carry on luggage bag, which had all my things for the whole weekend, at a table during a dinner at a church one night when I got called into another room for a meeting. I came back one hour later to find the dining hall deserted and my bags gone! Weirdly enough my handbag and Bible was kept right where it was but my luggage was gone. My mind started frantically thinking about all my things for the weekend that were in my bags- gone in an instant. Someone with good intentions had thought it was left there accidentally and took it in the hopes of finding its owner. Luckily a majority of those at the dinner were familiar to me so I was able to recover my things at the end of the night- but I sure learned my lesson! I always heard it being announced at an airport to "Never leave your luggage unattended" but I guess the same is true outside of an airport setting! I learned to either take it with me or let others know it's been kept there to retrieve later, haha.

Moving on to a lesson learned from my two day stop at home.
2. When packing, making a list always helps! & Don't cross of the item until it is securely placed inside your suitcase!
This used to be a downfall for me in the past but learning from my mistake has helped me pack more effectively and efficiently. I would put something in, cross it off the list only to take it out for another use and forget to put it back in. This time, I only crossed off items that were in my travel bag for good!

Lessons learned on the road!
3. Packing a lunch that travels well is an inexpensive and fun way to feed hungry stomachs out on the road!
I had the wonderful privilege of traveling with an older couple. The woman I traveled with thoughtfully brought delicious picnic style chicken salad sandwiches we could assemble ourselves. I'm familiar with always having a rest stop at a McDonald's or Roy Rogers...something where you get fast food and spend some spare change on food that is probably not the best thing to eat for breakfast, lunch and dinner. However, this woman's example taught me what it looks like to have a good balance of spending and saving on the road (when possible)- we ate breakfast at Roy Rogers and we ate her home made sandwiches for lunch. Sadly on the way back we didn't have any home made sandwiches even though my cousin and I were secretly craving her chicken salad sandwich. ;) We did stop at Cracker Barrel though which made the ride home a bit sweeter. :)

I also learned that a road trip is a great way to find out more about your travel companions. Turning off the music for a while and just talking was a great way to keep drivers awake and also entertained. It surprised me how many hours we went simply talking without any music.Our voices and laughter were the music that filled the car as we shared and reflected on God's faithfulness in our lives. That was truly a blessing.

Lessons learned out at IWU! Here is probably where the most important lessons I'd learned.

From hearing several speakers and various testimonies of the wonderful people I met, there was one reoccurring message that was pounding away at my hard skull, which was:
4. Question things. (I am not talking about doubting)
I get so stuck in a rut of reading and understanding the Bible in a mundane and routine way....I find myself reading parables as stories that I assume make complete sense without any questioning of whats happening, why its happening the way its happening and who is making what happen. Did that confuse you enough?
I don't remember the last time I read a familiar passage in the Bible and asked out loud why is it a woman losing her coin? Why isn't it a man losing 1 out of his 10 coins? Why is it just one coin that she lost out of 10? Is there something special about 10 coins? (If you didn't get my reference, it was of the parable of the lost coin found in Luke 15.) The truth I was reminded of last week is that God writes things in the Bible in such a way that there is so much more to understand if only I would just wonder about it. I mean, if we're talking about the One who thought it important to write words "it was night" when describing when Judas left the table at the last supper: "As soon as Judas had taken the bread, he went out. And it was night." John 13:30
When God writes something, He writes it with a purpose and leaves out nothing that He finds important. Do you think the God who had even the thread color of the robes of His Old Testament priests written down would somehow forget to write down what color a woman's head covering should be? No. He writes things with purpose and He also leaves things out (color of a woman's head covering) with purpose.Yet here I am many times just sitting and reading His Word as I would read any old story book. I need to learn how to pry open the words on the page instead of assuming I understand everything I need to from the words written right there. I heard a speaker once say, "You are not supposed to read the Bible, you are supposed to read a magazine. You are supposed to study the Bible." I pray I can start implementing this lesson learned in my life A.S.A.P.

Last lesson learned:
I remember talking to a friend on how to be a more useful vessel for my Maker and the lesson I learned from that one conversation has altered my way of thinking for good.
5. God is more concerned about the work He is doing IN me rather than the work He is doing THROUGH me.
Sometimes I get so focused on how I can be used for God to bring Him glory rather than realizing that God can use anyone to bring Him glory. The truth is that God is more concerned about the work He is doing inside of me rather than what He can do through me. That was a slap in the face kind of moment. It's not bad to be concerned about bringing God glory but its when I forget that I, or in essence what is going on inside of me and my life is what will bring God glory more than any place I go, words I say or some type of good work I do in the hope of bringing God glory. The thing God is working in me will speak louder than anything  He does through me.

Well, those are just A FEW of the lessons I've learned from my little trip. If I'd written on all the lessons, I wouldn't even be able to look back and read that long of a blog post so I'm really sparing myself. By not writing them all down I'm trusting that I have committed to memory* what I have learned...and boy am I learning how valuable my memory is. Mental pictures rather than physical, tangible photographs. Quite frankly I'm not sure what I'll do when I get old and my memory fails me. Thankfully when my memory fails, I'll be able to lean on the Rock who promises to never forget me.

"What is the price of five sparrows? A couple of pennies? Yet God does not forget a single one of them. And the very hairs on your head are all numbered. So don't be afraid; you are more valuable to him than a whole flock of sparrows." (Luke 12:6)

Happy New Year!

What a strange new year it was! 500 miles away from home, in a stranger's house, surrounded by close to 30 new faces all enjoying each other's company under the roof of a beautifully furnished log cabin. Let's just say I had an unforgettable last week of 2011.
It all started on Tuesday, December 27th, 2011 when myself and four other girls left our homes and started a journey which would ultimately end in Kernersville, North Carolina. Early morning about about 5 am we left and passed through four states in about two hours. Our first stop was for breakfast in Virginia where we ate at the lovely Village Cafe (also seen on Food Network's Diners, Drive-Ins, and Dives). I had the chance to eat three humongous pieces of  french toast with a side of grits. (Woohoo for a first time grit taster!) The grits were porridgy and somewhat bland. Definitely old people food. It was definitely my goal to eat grits wherever I got the chance to- since I was travelling down south afterall! We then arrived in NC around noon where we stopped in to see a family friend. After spending time there we resumed our journey into Charlotte, NC for the 2011 Rise Up Conference- here is where we stayed till Friday the 30th. Let me just say that I've never been to a conference like this. So many different age groups all praising God and there to hear the unbridled, pure Word of God. Although there were MANY and I mean many truths that I learned that need to be implemented in my life, two things in particular stuck in my head.

1) We are meant to be in this world right now. We are like ships- What is a ship made for? A ship is made to be in the water. When does the problem arise? When water gets into the ship. We are made to be in this world. When does the problem arise? When the world gets into us.

2) Be wary of using the term "how can we kill time?" We must redeem or purchase our time. It is So V a l u a b l e. Even the Bible tells us to do so- check out Ephesians 5:16.

I met so many great people that week that I'll never forget. Some I may not ever see again till after I see my Lord.

Some awesome memories from the week: (these are more for my own recollection rather than your entertainment- although I don't discourage you being entertained by my thoughts :p)

Tuesday 12/27:
-My innate knowledge of when Gina would want to get into another lane while driving caused me to always yell out, "You're good" - Why am I such a backseat driver? lol :p
-Jeeja in the car having ADD and needing a horse tranquilizer...badly.
-Getting myself into a sticky situation at Village Cafe with the pancake syrup hehe
-Becoming stuck in traffic for an hour and a half on the way to the hotel all because of a BOWL GAME?? (I had no idea what a Bowl game was until last week haha)
-Finally arriving at the Marriott.
Wednesday 12/28:
-Meeting awesome people and singing together at the Hymn Sing!
-Joe Reese ended his message with the chorus of Turn Your Eyes Upon Jesus!!! & Someone chose to sing that at the Hymn Sing! = Amazing.
-Random guy at Marriott asked Roby and me about the conference- children prayed for him and he saw it.
Thursday 12/29:
-IHOP dinner at midnight with some awesome people.
-Midnight madness after dinner where chaos broke out when our pen shattered into a million pieces.
-The Journey is the Destination
Friday 12/30:
-Saying goodbye to all the wonderful people was sad on my heart...but I guess it's time to go back into my nook of the world and implement the changes I learned.
-Visited the Billy Graham Museum and went to Mac's BBQ- hand's down best BBQ outing I've ever been to.
-Justin and Jogi sceaming out foods for Jason to order while he was talking calmly to the waitress and the best grit's I've ever tasted!! (Cheddar grits) I also got to try grits for breakfast on Thursday morning at the hotel! They were better than Village Cafe's but not better than Mac's.
-Arriving at a rocky driveway that seemed to lead to an ax murderer but it was Ellie's beautiful home at night.
-Crying from laughing so hard during dinner that I had to separate myself and eat dinner in the dining room.
Saturday 12/31:
-Indescribable log cabin owned by Pink and Sarah.
-Rita's house and the man cave with at least 30 stuffed deer heads on the wall.
Sunday1/1/12:
-Ate breakfast too fast- not good move for me.
-Took the scenic route home- amazing scenery I will never forget: mountains, valleys, cows grazing on the hillside, homes located miles away from each other, and it goes on...

My goal for 2012:
Implement real changes in my life.
Pray more.

The Loner

http://press.visitphilly.com/uploads/photos/1028_l.jpg

Today was a good day. Other than the fact that I couldn't focus and felt like I was getting sick, it was a good day. Even though I didn't get my work done or any of the things I set out to do, it was a good day. Why? Because I went on a walk! Ok, you might think I'm crazy. But I honestly realized how I really need more walks in my life. Just me, a personal walk, a stroll down memory lane (or in this case, 41st street). I have a three hour break on Fridays in between classes. I had a plan to get an essay done. Unfortunately, I couldn't focus at all. I decided to take a walk outside and thankfully it was beautiful, cool and sunny. I walked past cars, people, a park and found myself standing in front of a cafe. I decided to go in and see what this cafe had to offer me. I decided to purchase a small caramel latte and stepped back outside on my walk. The cafe reminded me of a coffee shop you would find in Kerala. Small, quaint, wooden floors, forest green paint- very cozy. I felt like a loner just walking by myself and getting a coffee by myself but to be honest, it felt very good. It was nice to just stroll. Quiet. Sunshine. Trees. Cold air. Warm latte in my hand. The day was so peaceful in those 30 minutes I used to walk. I even had some time to talk with God on this walk. I realized I need to do more of these walks. Hopefully I can make more time to do this sort of daily exercise. These lone walks really exercise the mind and body. =)

My Life: An Update

I'm sitting. It's late Thursday night, early Friday morning..however you want to look at it. Couldn't sleep. Serves me right for drinking two glasses full of iced coffee. I finally got the right ratio of coffee, milk, ice and sugar that suits my taste. There's thunder outside. I can hear the rain against my window pane. If I leave my room, I'll hear the rain hitting the roof. It's pouring outside. Drip..drip..drip..splash...swoosh...THUNDER. Cue lightening. aaand now the rain just increased from a full out monsoon to even fuller outier monsoon. I lit a candle. Never buy the aroma therapy candles from bath and body works-the "scent" doesn't linger nor fill the air. Thunder. The rain has let off a bit now.

About two weeks ago, Saturday morning, while studying for a micro exam, I decided to take a break. I flipped on the TV and a golf tournament was on. Before giving in to my natural instinct to flip the channel and never return to CBS 3, I stopped to watch. Guess what, I actually enjoyed it! Now I wasn't sure if I had become delirious after studying for hours (ok fine, an hour) so I decided I would watch the following week-which I did. I enjoyed that game also! I think I have a new found appreciation for the game. I can honestly say that I hope golf is on this Saturday. aaand that's just a tid bit of what's been happening in my life recently. More posts to come!

My Life: An Update- Toast, Green Tea & Honey

For the past month, I've been on winter break from school and the one thing I can say that I cherish is having time to sit down and enjoy breakfast. In the hustle and bustle of the normal school day, often times breakfast is forgotten and a quick cereal bar or energy shake takes its place. If there's one thing I liked about break, it's having breakfast. Many people have shared with me their morning breakfast routines. One friend of mine recited to me their daily morning breakfast as: 1 waffle with butter and syrup, 1 scrambled egg and coffee. Another said: forget everything else, just hand me the coffee. My own breakfast to do list? None...well none until yesterday. I've discovered that I really like the combination of toast and green tea with honey. Green tea by itself to me tastes absolutely horrible...just horrible. However, when its combined with toast and butter, it's just plain ol' good. I wonder if I'll carry this breakfast into next week when classes start. It's a strong contender next to my usual cereal or waffle breakfast. Whatever may be, I really hope to schedule in time for breakfast this coming semester. I'm actually sitting here right now eating toast and green tea with honey and it's close to dinner time!

Now let's talk about honey. I think I've fallen under the spell of the honey bee orrr Winnie the pooh fever. I really like honey! Of course its this whole "having breakfast during break" thing that has made me discover that I like honey but I never really realized how indescribably good the taste is. It's light and sweet and golden and just reminds me of the Bible. Huh? The Bible you say? Why of course! Honey is all over the bible. God promised to the Israelites the land flowing with milk and honey. John the Baptist ate locusts and wild honey...yum! no seriously if he ate pure wild honey, then anything he might of paired it with might have tasted good ;) Eating honey really takes me back to biblical times where I can imagine the people of God sitting around a table eating supper and passing the honey and the flat bread or that roasted lamb around the table. It sure must have been tasty. Honey just reminds me of the provisions God makes for his people and just how sweet his blessings really are. I don't really know why I'm ranting on about toast and green tea and honey but all I can say is I thank God for toast, green tea, honey, and most of all showing how great his provisions and blessings are to his people through a simple breakfast.